tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36757362011-07-07T22:51:12.001-07:00emobotto spite a falling skyEmobotnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2921100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-83183898282690078012011-05-17T16:27:00.000-07:002011-05-17T16:33:37.942-07:00Fix your eyes on one spotEven if you stumble and stutterEven if it feels as thoughYour lungs are bursting from the strainWork your way toward itOnly slightly out of reachOnly a hair's breadth awayAlmost mocking you in the faceSimply breathe and let goEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-54194699618235704032010-09-28T14:53:00.000-07:002010-09-28T14:55:25.954-07:00The difference is:You run out of things to sayAnd the rules no longer applyEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-179536110420688092010-09-21T17:53:00.000-07:002010-09-21T17:58:09.248-07:00Goodbye, you saidAnd I simulate falling in loveAs these notes ring in my earsSoft humming, eyes closedHands waving, fingers tappingGoodbye, I replyAnd smile, as I shake my headYou're not going anywhereAnd neither am IEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-49987431494494918492010-09-02T12:19:00.001-07:002010-09-02T12:23:57.875-07:00Equilibrium is - for once - attainedNot via sheer force of will, but rather a sloping stagnationWhen uphill is the only route availableA plateau seems painfully blessedHard fought and hard wroughtWrested from the grip of a certain uncertaintyAnd all we can do is praise and thank the seasonsThat we are slightly less uncomfortable than beforeEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-90857835431000155112009-11-28T12:57:00.000-08:002009-11-28T13:01:53.293-08:00We've grown accustomed to this thankless trudgingFighting wars internallyStrife and conflict the only constantDawn breaking as we paw at our facesStreaking mud and tears and bloodFor every battle there must be a victorDo we even dare believeThat we should be the ones to survive?Hope is never lost; it is merely forgotten.Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-48973802680608507992009-09-25T03:37:00.000-07:002009-09-25T03:46:22.464-07:00This gnawing feeling reminds me how much I've missed out onExcluded on the way to bigger and better thingsWhen the horizon is just out of reachAnd every step removes you further from meEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-12833683647894606812009-08-10T11:06:00.000-07:002009-08-10T11:12:57.669-07:00Seems like there's so much to learn from youWith a smile so joyful I almost believed it to be realAnd when I ask for somethingIt's usually undeservedAnd comes with all kinds of strings attachedEven though I'd like for you to prove me wrongI still won't be holding my breath for youEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-58855716483397830272009-05-31T14:09:00.000-07:002009-05-31T14:28:09.464-07:00I am sitting in a sparsely furnished room, in a house that does not belong to me, in a country in which I was not born. I realize that we all are a congregation of misers and fools and that freely given advice and the common sense we swear we possess are but the jilted brides of our conscience, twisted and mangled like a car wreck.I think of my father, without whom I would not be, and without Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-36578424172170544692009-04-03T01:09:00.000-07:002009-04-03T01:10:44.978-07:00Will you be loyal?Will you be true?Will you fulfill all the questsI've set for you?Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-83229729459376592702009-04-03T00:58:00.000-07:002009-04-03T01:01:23.655-07:00There was nothing left back thereBut there is nothing to look forward to hereEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-89791776499811012432009-02-07T09:47:00.000-08:002009-02-07T09:49:22.311-08:00I am doom wrapped in skinI am a curse uttered from a billion lipsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-36771989908932637592009-02-07T09:36:00.000-08:002009-02-07T09:42:06.387-08:00It's like I spent six days at the bottom of the oceanFeeble and incoherentWondering where all the good times had goneSifted away like sandThrough trembling fingersRed, raw and stainedFrom clawing away at it allImagining that time and tide would rollLike a wheel, bringing them back to meGratification eludes like a ghostFlitting in the jungleBurning trees as it passesFriendship is a bitch that Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-62589162100089614182008-12-22T11:47:00.000-08:002008-12-22T11:52:17.667-08:00I needed a shot of that bitter hatredA sip from your cupBut it tasted so much betterThan the thought of youSo these dead soldiers line my tableHaving fought a war and lostEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-21404830793413624802008-12-13T20:27:00.000-08:002008-12-13T20:28:12.635-08:00I'm terrible when I'm happyEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-72581136714016632232008-12-13T18:08:00.000-08:002008-12-13T20:27:10.251-08:00Just like meThe confetti never touched herThough with much less pretenseEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-2679741066066900582008-11-17T00:10:00.000-08:002008-11-17T00:22:20.435-08:00Would that we could dance with our memoriesFlitting through past experiencesGrinding everything to a haltAs we sift through meaningless knick-knacksIn a sea of grainWith eyes as vacant as my chestAnd with hope as hollow as these truthsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-35605547797145650792008-10-28T04:34:00.000-07:002008-10-28T04:40:03.653-07:00For a moment there I almost blamed myselfAshamed of myselfThe imagined things I almost didThe illusory words I nearly weavedThen I thought back at the small thingsThat never really added upIrksome, peculiarNagging and cloyingParticular bad habits that I gladly glossed overIgnoring them in favour for moments of blissI wasSacrificedEking for fantasies I could not fulfillKarma is a bitchAnd it all Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-85801468730264643972008-09-30T11:24:00.000-07:002008-09-30T11:32:00.321-07:00The words are resoundingReboundingEchoing so loudly ICan't stand to even look at youWhen you spit lies so easilyBreezilyWhetting your tongue with meAnd what am I but a phantomEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-15653251245148461422008-09-25T21:21:00.000-07:002008-09-25T21:38:51.399-07:00Peering into your lifeThrough cramped frames of insightI have eight by six hundred pixelsTo know youAt funerals and wakesSegregated by classDistinguished by upbringingConnected by deathAnd the little ironies that tag alongEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-45369612439727309272008-09-22T21:16:00.000-07:002008-09-22T21:23:09.924-07:00More beast than manBreathing and stalkingCursed and reviledBranded as treacherousEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-32348881481873555242008-09-07T21:26:00.001-07:002008-09-07T21:31:48.728-07:00There is never any element of intentionGod knows, it wouldn't work that wayThe most offensive of actionsAre the ones performed unconsciouslyI will quit this stageOr more than likely be cast outAnd none will be left wantingFor lack of my presenceEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-7560491957027551572008-08-25T02:07:00.000-07:002008-08-25T02:18:37.375-07:00She is less of a whore than anyone else denies they areWith her wings singed by the flamesAnd her heart and eyes stale like sulphurIt's cruelty redefinedThat only I can love the most detestedEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-43268319209606439382008-08-04T14:02:00.000-07:002008-08-04T14:23:37.319-07:00O Highness!Shall we return to thy Government subsidized fortressIn mine petroleum powered carriage?I will escort thee to the rising draw-bridgeThat shuttles between the battlementsTill we reach the tallest spireBarred by an aluminum portcullisWhich locks are turned onlyBy that laser-etched key in thine hand?Thy noble Sire and fair maiden motherAwait withoutObserving their peasant subjectsThrough Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-57067215879416289392008-08-04T13:51:00.000-07:002008-08-04T14:02:07.175-07:00I do not regret and never willYou failed the only criterion I ever set for youI was never really upset, merely disappointedThat you had set yourself up so high on the listAny meagre shift meant a headlong plummetIt's laughable that you couldn't even match upWith expectations as low as mineThere is no standard of loyalty that cannot be breachedEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-21250508758920912802008-08-01T23:42:00.000-07:002008-08-01T23:52:10.455-07:00Weary and faltering I retrace the routeIt took to get me here;A few furtive looksKind words tossed casuallyA touch or the promise of oneUltraviolet skin glowAn artic-melting grinDeceit and lies and embellishmentsStraight-up denial and letdownsBroken trust and promisesMisuse, abuse and underestimationThe game is no longer funAnd joy has fled a while agoEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-16558273924292701822008-07-27T21:31:00.000-07:002008-07-27T21:34:54.545-07:00I'm lying as hard as I canFabricated feelings portrayedThrough a sculpted facadeFancy words hissed betweenClenched teethIt's as if the deception itself is falseAnd that the real actor is youEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-91982557217920150632008-07-25T15:06:00.000-07:002008-07-25T15:09:51.831-07:00If I sat hereGrowing roots into this chairFrom twelve to sixHolding a forlorn hopeAnd an unreasonable beliefThat you even give a damnWill it unfold and elevate me?Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-16701906226676803632008-06-16T23:34:00.000-07:002008-06-16T23:39:43.490-07:00Bathe in my sins, sweet loverAnd hide away when the lights hit the switchIn the morning we will pray for each otherReturning to dust, left behind in our wakeSomething much more than thisWith our heads punched in by the force of itHumbled and bowed by the weight of itEaten alive by the desire of itHeld down and forced to eat crowEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-12144139126470582312008-05-09T23:54:00.000-07:002008-05-09T23:57:00.123-07:00You are dead to meCast asideUseless and flounderingScreaming for an existenceThat you soiled and fouledYet you still presume to remainIn the rightI am done with you completelyEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-10879376733898973502008-04-03T07:43:00.000-07:002008-04-03T07:58:48.479-07:00I strive to be the one constantly in your thoughtsEvoking little gasps of delightsAs my image rolls across the plains of your mindTrampling doubt and contemptEchoing loudly as thunder silences everything elseEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-75378561761731100842008-03-06T19:22:00.000-08:002008-03-06T19:42:12.197-08:00You should only receive as much as you have givenYet, I have put in my all;Why have I only been recompensed a pittance?Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-51192693683650851902008-03-02T20:38:00.001-08:002008-03-23T19:40:22.892-07:00I am ChapterThis life is crafted and predestinedIndelibly printed for all to readBut pages burn and eyesight fadesAnd permanence is just a ghostI am VerseA tuneless dirge that waxes and wanesGrowing more tiresome each time it is repeatedAs soon forgotten as sungSounding hollow as silence forces it into submissionI am a TestamentWith blood like dirt and piss;Resolve forged in the heat of Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-80743536448022757132008-02-29T00:53:00.000-08:002008-02-29T01:19:18.261-08:00Whose backs are broken now?Posture that's impossible to regainStanding to an ovationHunched likeThe mental dwarves we really areEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-29005428731959288462008-02-25T10:10:00.000-08:002008-02-25T10:19:47.958-08:00I want for Peace between us;It's been so sorely lackingEvery snide comment passedExplodes like shrapnelDrowning out the things I need to explain to youOver the disgust you feel for meFor now we'll wish each other good nightAnd pray the night doesn't last too longSo where do we gain respite?And what if our bones don't heal?Tomorrow we'll dance againWe'll dance around each other cautiouslyEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-47712282132000846592008-01-01T11:03:00.000-08:002008-01-01T11:15:30.944-08:00I am wrapped up in deceptions;Immolated by liesWe pulled off a slight sleight of handOur consciences twisted into impositionsHypocrisy spewing from every gashInflicted on one anotherPunctured pride and ruined luckDenying me such hallowed prizesDecreeing my haplessnessTo a less than receptive audienceWould that I could corrupt your pale fleshAnd sink my teeth into youYour raven hair staining Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-14159249851949220062007-12-22T12:11:00.001-08:002007-12-22T12:14:44.295-08:00We kept that tiny window of human interaction openA split second in the grand scheme of thingsAn angry mob of regretsStoning each other deadFor crimes yet undiscoveredOr for reassurances left unsaidEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-30226488742541500532007-11-27T19:31:00.001-08:002007-11-27T19:42:52.644-08:00Exteriors are shimmering tonightFake smiles are captured over and againFrom the same angle becauseThat pose was practised in the bathroom mirrorPerfect clones of yourselfFramed for the world to gawk atPouty lips and sucked in cheeks, a winkThrown in for good measureInterminably cuteInsufficiently sincereAnd for every glass thrown backAnd for every fake kiss blownFor every person slanderedReap Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-57706379124985992672007-08-22T09:32:00.000-07:002007-08-22T10:32:03.114-07:00We ended up losing more face than was necessaryFalling over ourselves to exit this decrepit, squalid abodeYour teeth are tiny daggersDisplayed in a grin like a grimaceWeakening my resolve with each photograph you appear inTinged with heatArms around meBreaking my shoulders with the weight of your absenceEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-29340500613972922262007-06-05T21:11:00.001-07:002007-06-05T21:15:32.407-07:00Friends have been forgotten and lostBut not youIndelible ink stains on our lipsCackling and spittingCeaselessly bubbling and threatening to drownDisembarking from high horsesWith poison-laced newfound insightWhen I am vindicatedI will leave it all on the ground behind meSloughed off like shed skinAnd uncoveredI will disappearEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-16700541543434468912007-03-10T03:53:00.000-08:002007-03-10T03:55:21.995-08:00Sensations are forgotten quicklyStaring dully, blank,At wallsThat need no encouraging to appearBlackened and stainedExhaling the faintest fumesBathing in exultant guiltEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-33883726600826702502007-03-10T01:37:00.000-08:002007-03-10T01:47:37.153-08:00I am disintegratingShedding particles and atomsLittering the landscape behind meWith the essence of failureEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-69501340103697659482007-03-05T00:03:00.000-08:002007-03-05T22:48:05.018-08:00I cannot be interminableAll points lead somewhereAnd sister you knowSomewhere in between you found meLanguid on shores and coastsFuck it, keep on cruisingSpeed feedingDisappointment stamped on our foreheadsTime now for bullets and pissTeeth sharpened and claws rippedPromises made, defeatedCrawling back for another fist in the faceEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-83548932304689996772007-02-28T08:17:00.000-08:002007-02-28T08:21:44.327-08:00every second spent next to you is poisoning memy breath chills and fogs up the windscreeni am obliterated by your grim stareso i jam on the brakes and swerveand hope that you alightEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-14598886785715866682007-02-14T21:21:00.000-08:002007-02-14T21:23:52.549-08:00I'd forgotten how it tastes;Defeat, despairComing out of a coma fighting loose limbs and impertinent thoughtsStruggling to swim against a current too strong for hope to opposeI've been asleep so long - now startled awake,Heart gripped by venomous miasmaHead punching out from under a thin veneer of contentment, sucking in greedily thin air scraped clean of joyImmolating any chance of living a GoodEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1163751395948242862006-11-17T00:13:00.000-08:002006-11-17T00:16:35.960-08:00The truth is a bullet-woundRipped up flesh weakened by liesSustained by necrotic fluidsPumped by an exhausted heartWill winter seize usFreezing and burying everything?Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1153805032435278102006-07-24T22:15:00.000-07:002006-07-24T22:23:52.446-07:00Split smiles through split lipsAnd stained hearts bleed through stained slitsTongues set wagging and eyeshadow meltingBurying that demonic part of meAnd I'd beat you with my fistsIf I had proof that it'd stop you deadAnd truncate your future like I've dismembered mineKnuckles worn down from pounding boneEvery mistake magnifiedEvery slight and trespass modifiedStabbing blindly and screaming;"Fuck Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1153722217614675782006-07-23T23:18:00.000-07:002006-07-23T23:23:37.626-07:00I am astonished at the rate of changeIt flip-flops me between courage and cringeingOf hoping for something that requires me to be paranoidDying a little so that I can be redeemedEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1150170990232466242006-06-12T20:36:00.000-07:002006-06-12T20:56:30.293-07:00Stress fractures fissioningIn rapid, synchronized disharmonySapping the strength from these tired limbsThat are weary from treading, flailing and shovingBurdens were meant to be sustainableEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1147332627366704852006-05-11T00:25:00.000-07:002006-05-11T00:30:27.376-07:00Do you feel like giving up?Have you fallen down so many timesThat this rosy picture no longer paints itself?Or have you tried so many timesTo crawl back from defeatThat you fingersJust don't feel numb anymore?We've given too much of ourselvesTo ever be whole againEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1145695955648646132006-04-22T01:44:00.001-07:002006-04-22T01:52:35.646-07:00Prodding around, shifting sticksThat bouy our spirits so;Discovering that each splinterWields its own kind of tranceAs we stare at penetrative sliversTrembling lips and teary eyesFleetingly recall softer daysWhen your heart beat as strongEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1145356682623176982006-04-18T03:33:00.000-07:002006-04-18T03:41:47.286-07:00Sparingly; we basked in the warmth of each otherConviviality seeping in through the cracksOf friendships struck asunderPost-mortem rememberanceEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1144731590772603082006-04-10T21:49:00.000-07:002006-04-10T21:59:50.786-07:00I am Fury; and I am RighteousNo longer perfectFractured upon my conscienceBorderline antipathy stretching reality thinWhat gifts I have in store forYour unblemished mindSecure and assuredThat History is written by people like youApathetic, secularRiding the mainstream of thoughtBrokering deals in the pretenceOf exposing the nerve/cultureBeware the warmongery of ExistenceIt will beat you and Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1144486079770052452006-04-08T01:42:00.000-07:002006-04-08T01:48:02.176-07:00Forgive me, forgive me!And rescue my damned soul from oblivionTo be wrested free from the the grips of angelsAnd thrust earthwards into the fiery pitsOr worse yet, to carry on livingAnd feeling, reeling, failingFalling over broken promises and empty dreamsCaving in when expectedRarely rising to the surface to breatheRasping at the dry airBroken heart sinking to the ocean floorMingling with the Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1143707524481292012006-03-30T00:20:00.000-08:002006-03-30T20:46:53.580-08:00This is all that I have left to receiveWhere has satisfaction fled?And in it's wake seeds sown by handsToo tired to be of useRealizations go ripping pastEchoing past my ears as they whipBehind me, thumping as they breakAs the winds of failure blast my faceGenetically coded for failureGroomed to be an outcastEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1143100991418596202006-03-22T23:55:00.000-08:002006-03-23T00:03:11.433-08:00Another year of swiftly fading ambitionHas stumbled by; creaking with old failuresAnd bowed by the weight of misfortunes yet undiscoveredStrangled by hands tightly bound by petty mistakesSubmerged into waters unfit for dreams to thriveI've had the life driven out of meI've had my life driven out of meEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1142504671279491032006-03-16T02:14:00.000-08:002006-03-16T02:24:31.290-08:00This compressed feeling in centre of my being has been removedReplaced by serenity, wrought by your unmaskingWarm hearth in lieu of cold marbleTerrors stripped away and confessions laid bareWe minced about lightly, tentative moves in a complex balletBurdened by information no longer;Too little to register in your mindToo much for one person to bearBut basking in the answersI am renewedEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1142080114046240182006-03-11T04:23:00.000-08:002006-03-11T04:28:36.216-08:00It's a foreign disease;That seeps into your entrailsAnd bleeds into your gutTill swollen and hemorrhagingSpewing forth little details that never seemed to catch your eyeLike the way you made hearts flutterThe sheen of your skin glowing infra-redSnide comments traded and receivedPassing judgement on mePassing over meAnd so bled the KingPouring wine into his veinsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1141811637467139792006-03-08T01:34:00.000-08:002006-03-08T01:53:57.476-08:00Dearest contemporary;You slapped away the hand that reached out to drag you from this pitAnd shunned embraces that seemed like pitySlept on floors that filth has clung toFoetal and weak and mewlingI won't believe the lies you've spunLike cloaks that dissemble and camouflageWrapping us in premature rapture and spontaneous faithAs if everything can be decided by clean stab wounds in the backAnd Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1141029004174717452006-02-27T00:18:00.000-08:002006-02-27T00:30:04.183-08:00When the smog chokes me like so many invisible handsI will realize the dread and trepidation that has lingered around me for so longHas begun to crystallize, strengthened as miles put distance betwixtForestalling my implosion, surely as you’ve embraced meI look forward no longer with unbridled furyOr covetous glances and staresOr questions that sting our eyes and weigh down our handsInstead, our Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1135271372946275122005-12-22T09:05:00.000-08:002005-12-22T09:09:32.956-08:00Do you sleep better at nightKnowing that you've utterly crushed my being;In spirit and in thoughtPrevalently?And if fate had played out expectedlyWould I be the one for whom you gloss overFlaws and ineptitudes?I paid the price for fickleness-Maybe you could reach backAnd feel for shreds of sincerityThat are probably lost for goodEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1129992040221177382005-10-22T07:34:00.000-07:002005-10-22T07:40:40.226-07:00We are the trigger; this is releaseFeverently I maintain that I was not cut out for thisExposing nerves like a laundry lineEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1127310056079652102005-09-21T06:36:00.000-07:002005-09-21T06:40:56.086-07:00Everything's gone southJust as I always maintained it wouldStomping on fingers holding onto ledgesCutting our suspension as we floatWe've been cursed our whole livesWhat makes you think it will stop here?Constantly pummelled as we sleepShaken and abused when we awakenWe will never see the light of dayWe will never shine the way we should haveWe are destined for failure, designed to Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1124717138053418332005-08-22T06:20:00.000-07:002005-08-22T06:25:38.053-07:00I always knew I was better than youBut contrary to sound advice I glanced at tiny anagramsLodged in hovering spaceWords waiting to surge forthBut stopping shortHave you ever wondered what it might've been likeTo look at me, views inversed from what you currently hold?Does the fact that distance from those you truly connect withRestrains you from finding what you really need?I hope the people Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1123917189633831862005-08-13T00:08:00.000-07:002005-08-13T13:17:05.630-07:00Rise, oh Latent TigerGive me the rage to crush my enemiesTo sweep them away like the burgeoning tideMincing them as I maul past with kinetic furyTurning puce as they rot into sludgeEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1123864672322831942005-08-12T09:25:00.000-07:002005-08-12T09:37:52.326-07:00Your life has taken precedence over my own;Softly your fingers embrace mineStriving for the equilibrium that has eluded us bothTangible yet so distant - effervescent alwaysWe've replaced fear with hopeRipe and slender, interspersed with seeds of a futureThat has yet to materialise before usCrystallised in our heartsI wear my heart on my shirtsleevesReanimated from stone; a damascened shellYour Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1123181621356743182005-08-04T11:43:00.000-07:002005-08-04T11:53:41.360-07:00We have doubts and misgivingsBundled together with infant hopeCarried in a cradle conceived by dreamsFortitude comes, steadily increasingTorrents of determination rushing meI am swept away; flotsam in the passing tideYou are the rock I cling unto; daring this changeTo unhinge me and fling me away -I knowYou are steadfast, anchoring me firmly with loveEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1123001512985621382005-08-02T09:38:00.000-07:002005-08-02T09:51:52.990-07:00This test proves to be the best therapy I've knownWith hands unsure I've folded paper heartsTossed them over barricades; back to the warfrontOr into the safety of your seeking fingersAnd each new stare sends me reeling forwardHeadfirst into comfortable uncertaintyWeary prizefighters sizing up the oppositionWe probe and jab, flinch and quiverSmoothing the edges and biding our timeEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1121708737024893752005-07-18T10:32:00.000-07:002005-07-18T10:45:37.030-07:00And being so honest has never been easyBut it feels like this tonne of bricks may just miss me todayFor it started with a reasonable questionKisses that came faster than reasonable thoughtCompleted withal; broken heart mendedThe shambles that I used to beRestored and upliftedDoubts that could cripple are sifted awayInspired and transformed in your loving armsI am dissolved in the balm of your Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1121558946682014482005-07-16T17:00:00.000-07:002005-07-16T17:09:06.686-07:00There is no perfection in our daily lives;And of you there is no exceptionBut your tiny flaws are glossed overBy your ability to accept all of mineWe are old - leaving preconceived notions writhing and bleedingAs we take that drive, under the watchful glow of lit up highwaysEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1121203058105997792005-07-12T14:12:00.000-07:002005-07-12T14:17:38.110-07:00Rejection has taught me nothingWhen old comforts, like shrouds dissolveIn your radiance, brilliant and effervasivePinned down on me like arrows and dartsKeeping me laid out, drunken in my stuporLeaving skid marks on my heartBreaking old bonds and promises to distrustTurning me around, planting kisses like blessingsAnd I can't, I just can't do itTaking steps forward breaks my legsConverting Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120660357965970212005-07-06T07:21:00.000-07:002005-07-06T07:32:37.970-07:00My life is over at age twenty twoI have no legacyNo loyaltiesNo great deed to which I may anchor my hopesBurdened and trussed up for all to viewThe yoke of fidelity breaking my shoulders, crushing my spiritCursed and reviled, I reel awayFlailingSpitting oaths and promisesYour expectations of me are false and made of sugar glassDestined to shatterNo faraway lands for meThe glow of streetlamps fadeEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120525356309186082005-07-04T17:57:00.000-07:002005-07-04T18:02:36.313-07:00Because those days never meant any more than the short-term;We fell into travail and sank slowly to the bottomCarefully sidestepping fragile commentsAnd overcautious snippets of conversationA quixotic existence for hypocrites such as us;Fantasizing about each other, or someone similarEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120385505996780582005-07-03T03:06:00.000-07:002005-07-03T03:11:46.086-07:00I posed tentative questions which you rightfully ignoredAnd with bored resignation you batted aside my attentionsFully loaded and loathed; a fleeting chance that I mightBreach the wall you've built around your embittered heartEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120333758069391532005-07-02T12:44:00.000-07:002005-07-02T12:49:18.073-07:00We tripped over one anotherCalling names and guessing numbersTipping over glasses with fake accentsReminding each other of days gone byWhen we were starving, wet, coldTaking the piss on each one in turnBurning old contentionsRenewing respect and admirationForeseeing future days spent far awayWhere dreams surface, coming up for airEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120278552160925712005-07-01T21:24:00.000-07:002005-07-01T21:29:12.160-07:00I find myself avoiding your gazeFeigning disinterest and ambivalencyAs I enter your orbit I am swirled aboutSpat out at the end of a conversationEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1120140954439468552005-06-30T06:53:00.000-07:002005-06-30T07:15:54.443-07:00We made these farewells seem like poisonous slursGradually we let them slip from our grasps, limp string leashesLashing us to tired memories and slivers of our youthViewed through mirrors, encased in little plastic jewel boxesWith nary a look backwards we extended fingersAnd hoped that the firmness of a handshake might cementOr hold in place our dilapidated friendshipQuaking and shivering for Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1119738794763567382005-06-25T15:28:00.000-07:002005-06-25T15:33:14.766-07:00Light me up (and breathe in)Now fill me upSleep filled eyes brim with regretHide your faceFlash your pretty teethHeavy with deceit and cunningSlap me againSend me signals that do not connectExpect too much and receive too littleIt has been tried and proven true;We fight for tiny chances to prove our sincerityNearly always we end up sorely lackingEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1119289706174996422005-06-20T10:35:00.000-07:002005-06-20T10:48:26.180-07:00Your stolen features stare pointedly at meAt bayonet point I am forced unto trembling kneesThat shudder and shake with imperceivable nauseaFitful sleep that tears dreams away from somnambulanceAnd you lack a smile; warmth radiates from your personaTanned lines rim the oculi of the mask you projectHalf awake yet brimming with alertnessHushed tones and quiet questions resound aimlesslyYet I revileEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1118955071543036502005-06-16T13:45:00.000-07:002005-06-20T10:35:19.473-07:00When we die tonightWould you still have doubts like I do?Blossoming; blood on white linenExploding sanguineDid we live like destitutesClutching threadbare hope to our hearts?Does his warmth fill the vacuum left by my absenceSpecks of my existence flickering like apparations?Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1118954503059030042005-06-16T13:34:00.000-07:002005-06-16T13:42:41.720-07:00If this year doesn't kill meIt wouldn't take much to finish the jobPlus the billion things yet left to sayHung to dry this nightLike the places we've beenAnd the things we've doneAll the regret in me bottled upYou're still three thousand miles awaySometimes it just feels as though we were cursedThat we never did anything about itMakes everything seem all the more triteEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1118342313395447712005-06-09T11:31:00.000-07:002005-06-09T11:38:33.400-07:00We are cut from fine-veined marbleStoically we bleed from these woundsQuietly we endureStridently we sally forthSpouting epiphanies that belie the truth;We are diamonds uncut and unpolishedGround down by teeth so fineSplintering from internal pressureThat relief has not yet blessedWe are a pact that was madeUpon strewn corpses and digestive fluidsSickeningly saccharineWe are the promise of Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1118250396990352372005-06-08T09:58:00.000-07:002005-06-08T10:06:36.996-07:00I am lost; I am lost!With this tide come bodings of days misspentAnd eluded glory that will seep through our fingersDull bladed winds licking them awayWith this charge above my headHovering and dispensing calamityThat I will burn out quickly and with little flareForgotten; having accomplished nothingPushing myself forward with little hope of gainDispersed, green patterns burning tattoos into my Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1117556376857018542005-05-31T09:17:00.000-07:002005-05-31T09:19:36.860-07:00I am so afraidOf this slow, pulsing throb of anxiety and fretfulnessNothing is certainAnd I only hope that I can live onDay by daySeems everytime something goes rightWe got knocked downBlindsidedEven when we knew something was comingWe have crested this peakAnd things can only go from mediocre to terrifyingEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1117014623059662972005-05-25T02:40:00.000-07:002005-05-25T02:50:23.063-07:00So who gives a fuck about yourPerfect, Princess lifeWhere trivialities rule supremeAnd your troubles are banal and insipid?In your world, problems melt awayReplaced by only to be misplacedInsincerely and rapidly by ailing heartsFalse smiles and false hopes plastered on with obligatory, gratitious sexJustifying yourself in self-imposed accusationFading in an instant as you weakly grin at the Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1116604718301047972005-05-20T08:54:00.000-07:002005-05-20T08:58:38.306-07:00I fill this void with endless noveltyIn the hope I'd be too occupied to realizeHow dreadfully afraid I've becomeI am the latent tigerEvery night brings sighs and goodbyesAnd futile attempts to stay one step closerTo youWhen the whole world's already uprooted and floated awayHere I remainStill bitter, still wishingConfounded by the state of our affairEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1116521403017096762005-05-19T09:44:00.000-07:002005-05-19T09:50:03.023-07:00InescapableHung heavy shroud of trepidationDenial and refusal to returnMy gaoler and employerHot winds singe meBurning with a fury unbecomingSubjugating me because I knowI knowHowever they disguise or dissembleThe masks are worn thin by years of mediocrityHypocrisy and liesTearing and turning their blackened souls inside outTill whatever nobility once possessed is now irrevocably lostEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1115207410645282462005-05-04T04:44:00.000-07:002005-05-04T04:50:10.720-07:00My beasts are all awake;Licking teeth and gnawing bonesAnd straining at their leashesTo fling you around like paperMy sins are all aflameGlowing with jealous tonguesCaressing even the coldest skinThe exposition of our lustAdroitly popping buttonsUndoing knots and claspsYour fingers mashing fleshOr tearing at anxious seamsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1115137946471900762005-05-03T09:24:00.000-07:002005-05-03T09:32:26.473-07:00-My Letter-I keep stabbing myself;Looking at your photographsKnowing for sureAs my arms regain their numbnessThat you are definitely a lot happier than I amAbout the recent turn of eventsAnd that these pangs of remorse and regretAre no stronger than your desire to be freeMy half-hearted gestures of friendship and amityAre no longer wanted or tolerated by youThe tides of progress ebb and I am Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1115135642190035102005-05-03T08:33:00.000-07:002005-05-03T09:08:56.286-07:00Remember;You sitting in that arm chair, reading aloudClean feet squeaking on parquetYour glasses slipping down your noise as you noisily enunciateThings have come full circle nowAlthough it's been one trainwreck of a yearI still contemplate these notes and lettersLeft behind in your wake of progressAnd the replies I have for you stick in my throat;All semblance of composure eludes meBut if I Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1114365087596804622005-04-24T10:39:00.000-07:002005-04-24T10:51:27.596-07:00In years gone pastI called you BrotherTrading strengths and idealogiesInvulnerabilty and fearlessnessNow your impiety leaves nothing sacredNo blood pact, sworn on secrecyNo chasing dreams as destined or promisedNo longer any traditionWe're as distant as the sound of thunderStrangely numbed and vilifiedI've succumbed to this antipathyTrust and belief are two very seperate entitiesStitched togetherEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1114285267708602412005-04-23T12:33:00.000-07:002005-04-23T12:43:08.023-07:00We trudged past lamp-posts and road signsAnd it drained us to the point where we just should have saidEnough, I take it backThis conversation died before it even made us believeThat this road was worth walking againAnd with ghosts of the things we might leaveFor these were not mere words and escaped promisesOr the lies we spokeOr the truths we omittedOurs was the greatest of sinful past Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1114093138653137272005-04-21T07:09:00.000-07:002005-04-21T09:25:00.160-07:00If rage is to be my guide;Turn these hands into claws for ripping out naked visceraBlades of steel piercing and gougingI'd tear you from your sanctified wombWhere your dreams and ambitions rot and crumbleAnd everytime he kisses youHe'd be tasting my fleshAnd everytime he touches youYou'd know I've fouled the waters deepMy hands the bespoiler of your landsNothing is sacred anymoreNothing you can Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1114018406515547432005-04-20T10:25:00.000-07:002005-04-20T10:33:26.516-07:00Corpses gyrating to dead beatsRotting over noxious poisonsStumbling, searchingSomnambulent and wasting awayWe're all really deadCarnivorous; feeding on each otherBurning all our bridges and severing our tongues with our thoughtsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1113594167005158282005-04-15T12:30:00.000-07:002005-04-15T12:44:37.193-07:00We pass as ghost shipsTransmissions erratic, staticHectic;Never fully conveying what either of us meansIllusionary smiles and false concernMake it sadder to bear what we both know is true;That you and I know that answers never flowAs freely as this wineThat another man's arms could be safer than mine ever could beThat maybe I haven't grown up as much or as fast as I hoped I wouldOr that merely Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1112553047383717362005-04-03T11:18:00.000-07:002005-04-03T13:07:45.900-07:00We are empty nowDrained by great heaves and retchesVomitus in the form of our soulsBroken throats stripped bare by bileMemories like ghosts assault meBrief flashes of rememberanceDreams with you in them cage meYour fingertips like needlesEmancipated from youTwitching in my death throesWretched and twistedDying from systemic abuseEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1111681785056577492005-03-24T08:24:00.000-08:002005-03-24T08:29:45.056-08:00You reek of the stink of dissatisfactionAnd in fear you stalk this earthSeizing what little joy you canBearing the torch of your generationBurning with despairYou talk like you're sure of everythingYet your words ring true with guiltEverything you've loved is a lieYour beliefs are nothing but shroudsConvictions are feeble and weakThoughts of you wasting everythingFor the sake of mere whim and Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1110448643109117482005-03-10T01:50:00.000-08:002005-03-10T01:57:23.110-08:00Murder in my bloodAnd iced piss in my veinsLet these fists shut you the fuck upPress the knife up closeFuck yeahCan you buy back whatever I've stolen?Will whatever you've done to yourselfErase the touch of my hands?Fingermarks hollowed outOn shameful, empty cheeksThis is reversalThis is revolutionThis is fucking revenge and I take slow measure in its executionEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1109890538527461732005-03-03T14:45:00.000-08:002005-03-03T14:55:38.530-08:00Crawl, beast, crawlOn your dirty yellow belly crawlAnd gnaw and thrash and bellowClaws intent on rakingGushing bile and venomSeizing little childrenIn your belly full of hateRape, you monster, rapeAnd tear the clothes off virginsAnd pummel pretty facesFor your vices born of sin'Cause you've watched themOh you've watched themLaughing at you with their smilesFrozen on; a rictusYea, you'd like to Emobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1109889827075870782005-03-03T14:39:00.000-08:002005-03-03T14:43:47.076-08:00This is when we start anewDifferent strokes and different rulesI'm awake yet slightly changedIt feels good to be alive; here, nowI've cut loose from them bastardsEmobotnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3675736.post-1107969878503096682005-02-09T09:21:00.000-08:002005-02-09T09:26:52.396-08:00I do think that genes limit the person you are
If you're bitter, despondent, hysteric, ambivalent
Blame it on the person who sired you
Or the mother that brought you forth
When every petty squabble
Or over-dramatized argument
Becomes stale
And the only person who can take a step back is you
It becomes obvious that sometimes
Even blood can let you down
Emobotnoreply@blogger.com